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Sexual Positions
Positions for
Intercourse
Sexual Positions *Ideal for new
couples first starting to have intercourse*
Missionary Position (person with a penis or dildo
on top) In the missionary position, the person with a penis or dildo is
on top and assumes the dominant role. The other person who is on bottom
assumes the passive role. (Each person is lying down, stomach-stomach,
face-to-face. Most people may be able to remember using this position
the first time they had sex or in their early days of sexual
experimentation.) It is one of the tried and true methods for
intercourse. Unfortunately, this position gets a lot of bad press. It is
considered 'gendered and old-fashioned". I believe this is a great
position. The person on top has a lot of control over the degree of
stimulation that they get and the person on bottom can easily increase
their sexual pleasure by masturbating while simultaneously having
intercourse. If the partner on top is especially coordinated, she/he
could also help masturbate the person on bottom. Some of the techniques
used to create an intimate environment are eye-to-eye contact, guiding
your partners hip movements with your hands, massaging your partner's
neck/back, nibbling the other person's ears, necks or lips. And of
course, whispering something that only your partner can understand.
Sexual Positions *For the
creative couple who want a new sensation*
A slightly more technically advanced position,
than the basic missionary position . . . for the adventuresome couple
only. The person on bottom and the person on top switch leg positions.
The person on bottom closes their legs (in the missionary position, the
legs straddle (the person on top)). The person on top straddles the legs
of the person on bottom. Visually, at least in my mind, it looks as if
the person on top is doing a wide-legged push up. The benefit of this
position is simple: for the person on top, additional stimulation to the
penis/dildo and for the person on bottom, additional sensations on the
inner thighs. Caution: the top position is (for a top that desires) a
good physical workout. Expect to sweat.
Sexual Positions *Ideal for a
heavy-set couple*
A variation on the missionary position: The
passive person sits on the edge of a chair or bed, and the person with a
penis or dildo kneels in front of them. The person kneeling then uses
his/her or hips to thrust. Neither person is putting weight onto the
other person. As the person thrusting is perpendicular, his or her
weight is used more efficiently. Sex is exercise and does burn calories.
While this position requires a bit more co-ordination than the
missionary position, it is often considered less intimate. Face-to-face
contact, and whispering become less natural when not facing one another.
However, this position does allow for great foreplay. The person with
the penis/dildo is in an excellent position to explore their partner's
genitals with their eyes, hands or mouth.
Sexual Positions *For the
advanced, bored and/or uninhibited couple*
Instead of assuming the missionary position, where
the couple is head-to-head and toe-to-toe, one person should reverse
their position, so that the two of you will now be head-to-toe and
toe-to-head. Again, the difference between this position and the
missionary position is that this time, the partners face the opposite
direction of each other. Each person has a view of the other person's
feet. Make sure your feet smell good! The angle of entry is different
and often will require verbal communication. To make this work, the
person on bottom will need to arch her/his pelvic area (back flat
against the ground) and communication between the two of you will need
to be stellar. The angle of entry is very different than what most
couples are used to. I strongly suggest that the woman help guide the
penis/dildo with her hand into the correct position. This is a great
position for couples who want to try something new, and are prepared to
make fools of themselves and be comfortable laughing about how hard this
position makes lovemaking.
P.S. while each of you are now facing each other's
clean toes, why not have a nibble? Some people love a nibble. Sucking
toes and massaging the insoles adds an extra stimulation which can be
very arousing.
Sexual Positions *For a woman
who wants to have intercourse for the first time*
Woman on top is recommended for women who are
having sex for the first time because it puts them in control of the
situation. The woman is in a position to engulf the penis/dildo at her
own rate of comfort. Of course the other person has some control of the
situation too because they are constantly talking/sharing feelings
throughout this whole experience. In this position, the person on bottom
should tilt her or his hips, back flat on the ground. This allows for an
angle that often many women enjoy. In this position, the person on top
often lies atop with her legs stretched out or bent. Sometimes, she may
sit straight up and slide up and down. Many women report that they
really like this position because of the added genital stimulation (the
vulva rubs up against the person on bottom's pelvic bone). In addition,
men (again, if they are coordinated) can stimulate their partner's vulva
(and/or breasts and/or other body parts) with their hands or women could
masturbate themselves while having intercourse. Many people on bottom
find this particularly pleasurable because of the added visual
stimulation of seeing her breast. For a woman who appears
self-conscious, I recommend telling the woman how much you are enjoying
the way she moves, and how good it feels. This may help her relax. As
she relaxes, she may start to enjoy herself more. Actually, this tip
goes to all people. Positive reinforcement of pleasurable
sensations/movements is a good way to encourage your partner to continue
whatever she/he is doing.
Sexual Positions *For the
couple who prefers to sit*
This position is for those people who enjoy slow
motion sex. The angle for intercourse is not conducive to vigorous
thrusting. Position the person with the dildo/penis sits cross-legged on
the floor. The woman sits on top of him, with her legs straddled around
him. They are sitting face-to-face. This creates a perfect opportunity
to hug for a few minutes and be intimate. Be careful that you do not
fall over! Sitting on top of each other and maintaining stability is a
formidable task for most people. Some people prefer facing the same
direction. This is preferable for those who feel less coordinated or
embarrassed. You do not have to face the other person. But hey, if you
can not laugh about sex with your partner, are you ready to be doing
what you are doing with them? Sex is funny. Great chairs include rocking
chairs, kitchen table chairs and, of course, the chair in the office.
Sex on a chair makes for a good study-break.
Sexual Positions *For the
coordinated couple in a rush*
A true quickie, for the super coordinated couple--
try standing and having sex. In the ideal world, both people would be of
similar heights, or one person could be strong enough to lift the other
person to reach the right level. Women need to tilt their pelvic, so
that the vagina is forward, and easier to access. The person with a
penis/or dildo either need to squat a bit or have the woman be on a
small stool. However, if the woman is taller, then her partner may need
to stand on the small stool. This type of intercourse seems to work well
on staircases in an office building, down a dark alley, in the middle of
a graveyard and other such forbidden places. I highly recommend at least
one person wearing a skirt or some other such clothing, which will allow
for easy access.
Sexual Positions * For the
uncoordinated couple in a rush*
The woman puts her hands on a chair, desk, couch
or wall, leans forward, butt into the air. The person with a penis/dildo
penetrates her from behind. The woman will need to tilt her pelvic
region to easy the entry of the dildo/penis into her vagina. The person
from behind can controls the frequency of the thrusting. To help steady
him, he/she can hold onto her butt/hips and thrust. Often couples enjoy
hard thrusting. This position is much easier to achieve than the
standard face-to-face position. This position is great because in
addition to intercourse, it allows the person from behind to massage the
woman's breasts, give big hugs and even manually stimulate her vagina
with his/her hands. This position can also work well in a stairwell, in
an office setting or in a graveyard. It is easy to use this position to
have a 'quickie'.
Sexual Positions *For the
pregnant woman*
This position, side-by-side is recommended for the
person who is pregnant, or the couple who is sick of fighting about
whose turn it is to go on top or bottom. In this position, the couple
spoons together. This position can be very intimate. Many people report
that it is a natural feeling to hug the other person and feel protected.
In fact, some people find this position so relaxing that after
intercourse, they fall asleep in this position. Ok, but how does this
position actually work? Generally, the person with a dildo/penis is in
back, but it could be done the other way around. When the woman is in
front, to make her vagina easily accessible for penetration should tilt
her pelvis back and stomach forward. The person from behind slides his
penis/dildo in from behind. This, position is like the doggie-styled
position, except that both people are lying down.
Now that you know some cool moves, remember the
key to success is communication coupled with a bit of variation. Sex,
like dancing, if always done the same way, can get boring. If you
normally prefer to have sex in the morning, try having sex at night. If
you normally have sex on the bottom, try standing up. If you like to
have sex in bed, go hot tubbing and have sex in the hot tub. Change
whatever you are doing. Catch your partner by surprise. The most boring
thing in the world is if you can predict what your partner will do. If
you find yourself never initiating sex, initiate it 4 times in one day.
If you find yourself always instigating sex, then stop for two weeks and
see how your partner reacts to changing her/his role. For that matter,
if you always begin being sexually intimate by kissing first, play with
her/his toes first. If you normally start touching the genital area,
start by giving a backrub, which will turn into a front rub. Change is
the most critical part here. Anything different is an improvement. For
example:
- Blindfold and tie one person's hands
together. Then ask the person without use of their hands or eyes to
explore your body.
- Use foods, such as strawberries, whipped
cream, chocolate or honey and spread them out over each other's
body.
- Create a romantic atmosphere in the bathroom
(candles, music, and bubbles) and take a long luxurious bath. Wash
each other from head to toe. After both of you are thoroughly
relaxed and cleansed, start touching each other with your lips.
Begin by sucking on each other's right toes and work you way all the
way up to the left tip of their right finger.
Written By "Alex" Caroline Robboy, CAS, MSW, ACSW,
LCSW |